Bowser is attracted to Princess Peach. We didn’t need Jack Black singing about it in the massively successful Mario movie to figure that out. However, according to official Nintendo marketing materials, it seems Bowser prefers his Princesses bigger and thicker.
Super Mario Bros. Wonder launches later this month, adding to what might be one of the busiest months in video games in years. The upcoming Nintendo platformer looks fantastic, featuring a fresh 2D art style, wild powerups, and even a new voice actor for Mario. One of the new features in Wonder that caught the internet’s attention was the ability for Mario, Luigi, and other characters to become elephants. It’s weird, wild, and also, apparently, a big turn-on for Mario’s eternal enemy, Bowser.
Pre-order Super Mario Bros. Wonder: Amazon | Best Buy | GameStop
Look, I’m not making this up or basing this on some random conspiracies connecting deleted sprites, random voice lines, or easter eggs together into some fanciful, hard-to-buy “theory” that is ultimately just fan-fueled, non-canonical nonsense. No. The fact that Bowser is a man who prefers his lovers thicc was revealed by Nintendo itself via the company’s official Twitter account.
In the short video posted on October 11, we see Princess Peach hanging out in a white void, alone. Suddenly Bowser shows up with a tiny flower, looking to make his move. But then, a new powerup from Super Mario Bros. Wonder—the Elephant Fruit—hops across the screen and turns Peach into her plump elephant form. Bowser is shocked by the transformation and for a moment, it almost seems like the iconic villain is preparing to leave as he yanks away the flower he previously offered.
But nope! Instead, Bowser pulls out a larger, more impressive bouquet of flowers, pumps his scaly fist, and makes a noise I can only refer to as “horny growling.” The video ends there, likely because this is a family-friendly game from Nintendo and the wild sex that happened next is not something the company wants to advertise online.
As you can probably guess by now, fans reacted with a lot of memes and replies that boiled down to people cheering Bowser on and celebrating his love of bigger women. Some also warned Nintendo that the company had no idea what it had just unleashed onto the web.
Those people are being silly. A quick Google search will reveal that fans had already been making art featuring Bowser and elephant Peach getting it on months before this ad was released. The internet doesn’t need help coming up with this stuff, but I bet many are thankful Nintendo stepped in anyway to confirm their nastiest fantasies.
Anyway, Super Mario Bros. Wonder launches on October 20 exclusively on the Nintendo Switch. I know some of you will really, really enjoy it…
Pre-order Super Mario Bros. Wonder: Amazon | Best Buy | GameStop
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